Showing posts from January, 2016

Topics with Jason

if only i was Benjamin

there is a place i remember strangely,

it was warm and dim, a low and soft glowing light all around.
i was alone.
no music i heard, though,
occasionally a low humming which vibrated through my limbs.
it was a good place, that which i would realize too late.

for whence they bore me out of that place,
i cried out in anger.
my flesh suddenly exposed to a cold, dry air.
my lungs inhaled the thin and intoxicating particles.
and the noise. black speech all around.
i wanted to cover my ears but my hands were so harshly manipulated in all directions
by slippery elastic claws.
and the light, how i hated that light which ripped through my eyes,
so bright and intensely white.
i cried and cried. i cried for my warm place.
but it had abandoned me, or rather i had.
it would wonder where i was.

but now i am long boned and wise in the stupid subjects of this world.
it was never mine.
i struggle to belong.
i often think of that glowing place now and then, which was my origin.
and i think if i could go back i wouldn't take it for granted.
i would wrap myself up in its warm, peaceful dimness,
hiding myself safely, stored away.

alone i was.


it may be just a foggy idea or a way to put an artistic name to something. just another trip around the sun.

a new year, new possibilities and endless well wishes for the unseen to come and to become inspired by all that surrounds us. but as many say age is just a number, a new year is just...well...another day.

and possibly it feels good to think we have a fresh start, a template or canvas, blank, unto which the impossible becomes possible and somehow we think we have all the paint colors we need to slather on a different picture, hopeful and refreshing.

but its a muddy thing, this idea of a new year, a "re-beginning". it's all in our heads. any day now, we should just pick up that brush to do with it what we should have been doing all along; paint.