Tuesday, October 10, 2017

i had hoped in something unseen, an idea
fleeting as a single glimmer of a dead star
and, yes, i had hoped in that thing not guaranteed
never a touch nor a scent to demonstrate existence
but it is an idea
now ideas are the most curious of all the mind's tricks
able to build on itself into a mass of unfathomable heights
its mysterious depths lost even to the conjurer
an idea can manifest into that which the senses attach
waking every morning
red eyes to see it
hands shaking to behold it
legs weak to tread it
and the mind,
exhausted to conceive it
yes, an idea, the thing of all man's hopes.

Monday, October 9, 2017

i was fixated on a feeling
it was collecting in the crevices of my subconscious
eating at me like an infection
and when at once i could understand its nature
i was consumed, already, in a dream of vicious imagery
one after the other in a trance upon my cheeks
life like apparitions danced in line to the tune of violins
my throat, dry
but i sang a song to accompany
the lonely figures telling their stories
and crying out from the other side
and tore their skincloths in agony
and prayed empty promises
and chased the light
and they ate and drank their fill
until they fell
upon my feet
where my eyes had bound their bodies
and my lips trembled in mercy
have mercy
and quietly the silence gave way to a breath full of white


Monday, October 2, 2017

I am thinking one of these days I should wake up on a bright morning and drive down a road with the sunlight breaking through each branch as I pass. And I should, in my mind, not have any thoughts of regret or sadness. I will see, with clear eyes, a day which is beautiful and untainted with memories of days past drowning in remorse and anger and nervous hands clenched towards the future. I would, in that moment, be content, settled in an unceasing feeling of happiness that I have finally made it. I have finally made it. 

Wednesday, September 27, 2017

What is this feeling hanging in the air?
No one speaks, but their eyes say words the heart cannot.
What is this feeling hanging in the air?
It’s quiet, but their gait shouts loudly in a language.
The feeling of imminent danger, a crashing and then a hurt.
When I see her face, I see a daughter and a son.
She makes many phone calls so she can get paid.
I see a daughter and a son.
When someone elevated can determine your life,
There is a feeling hanging in the air.

What is this feeling hanging in the air?

Thursday, September 14, 2017

mother!

my predictions:

lawrence represents the earth, beautiful, innocent (in a sense), giving, caring, protecting, abundant, fertile (as she is with child in the movie). she urges bardem to stop allowing intruders (strangers) into her home.

bardem represents us, humans, takers, ruining mother earth, demanding that she give us more, more, more. we crave more, we search for more, more to life, more to love and take. he is a writer with writer's block, he assumes that the interactions with harris and his wife will help him to become who he really is suppose to be. the intruders who continue to show up is the attention he believes he needs to thrive, to continue with his purpose in life.  he searches in the wrong places.

harris and his wife could represent the addictions or habits that cause us to be the human kind that we are, when they intrude upon us, we take them in and we feed, house and bathe them. we take care of them and give them all our attentions, loving them more but destroying the home of mother earth in the process.

the various intruders who continue to show up at the house are the many things we put before loving the earth. environmental issues such as clearing vast acres of forest just to plant palm oil because the industry demands more, the use of plastic because it's convenient, the waste of food because we just eat too much or don't know how to donate the rest, the bloated food industry in the worst way (we all see how animals are treated).

perhaps we all search in the wrong places. metal for cars, diamonds for cute individual keeping, over fishing for the sake of the saturated industry and its demands. we were meant to enjoy this world, yes, created in abundance for all. but when we take more than we should, the world strains underneath the weight of our requests and she slowly, but surely, dissolves before our eyes.

these are my predictions. let's see if that's how the movie is interpreted.

Tuesday, September 12, 2017

Saturn

You taught me the courage of stars before you left.
How light carries on endlessly, even after death.
With shortness of breath, you explained the infinite.
How rare and beautiful it is to even exist.

-Sleeping At Last

Monday, September 11, 2017

I told him I was numb and the banners of my
will waved white.
It was straining under the weight of my
constant wishing.
I wanted the world to
yield and wait.
My time was liquid numbers slipping through the holes of
moments unlived.
I was worried about the ground beneath me and the sun in the
sky.
What does it feel like to sleep without
a blanket of anxiety
and
a pillow of concern?